tilbedelse
by Blue Interior
Summary: Loki meets his baby daughter for the first time and is completely enthralled with his newest secret. AU.


Loki Odinson was a very private man.

Even with his beloved mother and his bumbling brother, he held his cards so close to his chest they might as well have been melted into his skin.

But somehow, through all of his blusterings and misdirecting, Frigga and Thor saw plainly how much Loki adored his secret children.

He doted upon them in their little hidden home in the mountains, far from Odin's eye.

His sons were his sun, his moon, his stars. He would die for them, kill for them.

But deep down, in his heart of hearts, Loki wanted a daughter.

He wanted a little girl, to listen to her laugh, to watch her blossom, to accept flowers from sticky little hands, to braid hair as black as his own into teeny-tiny pigtails. He wanted to sit in on tea parties and read stories of maidens and heroes over and over until he tired of them, but kept on for her smile's sake. He wanted the ribbons, the dresses, the pink, the gentle sweetness purer than honey.

And so, when Angrboda announced the impending arrival of her third child, Loki's fourth, he hoped.

Secretly, Sleipnir, Fenris, and Jormungandr hoped too. Playfighting did get old after long enough.

"Pappa," a little voice called to him where he sat by the brook, "Pappa, Mamma said you can come in now."

Loki smiled, heart leaping in his chest, and took little Jor's hand.

They hurried back to the little house, Loki leaving his little boy with the other two playing in the trees.

In the room he shared with Angrboda, warm and tucked safely away in the back corner, his beloved lay propped up on cushions, flushed and tired. She beamed up at him, scarlet eyes glowing in the firelight.

Swallowing against the lump in his throat, Loki sidled gently up to her, planting a long kiss on her cool cheek. "Are you alright?"

"Fine," Angrboda murmured sweetly, a woman perfectly content with herself.

Loki peered into the worryingly small bundle. "And who's this?"

"Hel," Angrboda called to the little face, sweet and puckered and perfect, "Say hello to your Pappa."

Hel did no such thing, being much too new to the world to understand, but opened both impossibly small eyes. Loki's heart skipped a beat.

Those little eyes were green, the same green as his, and just as bright.

"A girl?" He managed when he found his voice at last.

Hel yawned her affirmation, little rosebud lips so perfectly pink he thought he'd die.

"Why Hel?" It was almost an afterthought, but it meant _her_ and as soon as the question occurred to him, he had to know.

Angrboda traced their little girl's nose with a single finger. "It means 'whole', and she completes our little family, making us finally whole."

Loki couldn't kiss his lover hard or sweetly or enough as she deserved.

"Do you want to hold her?"

Loki had never wanted anything more. Little Hel was gently transferred to his waiting arms.

Gods, she was so small.

This was far from the first time Loki had held one of his newborn children for the first time; after all, Hel was born to three older brothers. But something was different about this one. As she peered up at her pappa, he felt himself wrapping completely around her little finger.

He glanced over at Angrboda, to see if she was as mesmerized by this tiny thing as he, but the poor woman had drifted off to sleep, her head resting precariously on his shoulder.

As if sensing that the attention was no longer on her, little Hel let out an indignant mewl. Her father immediately snapped back to her.

"Don't cry," he nearly begged, "Mamma's right there, she's just napping."

Hel's lip still quivered, but she seemed to be considering this new input.

"You have no reason to cry, _kjære. _You have a Mamma and Pappa who love you more than all the stars in the sky, but we'll come back to your Pappa in a moment. You have three brothers: Sleipnir, who wants to teach you all about his books, Jormungandr, who can't wait to teach you how to swim, and Fenris, who just wants to hold you and make you laugh. They've been waiting so long for you.

"Now to your Pappa." Loki sighed, glancing down at his perfect little girl and wishing he was a better man, "He is flawed, Hel, you should know that now. He is jealous and arrogant and spiteful and bitter, but just the sight of you makes him forget all of that. Because when your father sees you, Hel, his heart swells until it feels it will break, his head aches with how much he loves you already. Your father will protect you and love you and care for you until his dying day."

Hel's eyes had never left his, and now, as he offered a single finger to her, she reached out and grasped it with surprising strength.

And now that she'd seen for herself that all was right with her world, Hel yawned one more big yawn and closed her eyes.

Loki couldn't be prouder of his two (two! he had a daughter! the most beautiful daughter!) girls.

He only wished that he really could promise her a perfect world.


End file.
